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Counting My Blessings

Posted by Lizzie on May-28-2008

I have issues with budgeting and planning. I don’t like to do either. However, with the way gas prices are today, I think it’s a good time to start. My husband and I aren’t going to retire any day soon and we’d like to keep our home, so this is something I really need to get a grip on. Right?

Lately I’ve seen a lot of people asking “What are you doing to cope?” That’s a good question. The economy is tanking and people are feeling the pinch. It’s come down to “Do I keep all 5 cell phones? Cut down to basic cable? Eat day old bread?” While I’ve been trying to learn to cut down on our expenses and find extra dollars here and there, I’ve been thinking of what my grandparents had to endure. And somehow managed to survive.

My great-grandmother was born before the Great Depression. They managed to live on $2-5 a week- if that. They didn’t have a car (much less two) and couldn’t afford to buy their children a different pair of shoes for each different outfit. As a matter of fact, my grandmother once told me that they had their “Sunday best”- which was only worn on Sunday - and their everyday clothes. Two outfits. That’s it. How did they do it? And meat was only eaten once a week- or twice if there was a holiday. They convened at the neighbor’s house when there was an interesting radio program playing, otherwise they did without (no TV mind you).

I look around my house and realize that we’ve got it good. I’m typing this on a PC and posting it via the Internet and if we were really that bad off, I would have neither of these luxuries. I wouldn’t have a special shampoo or be able to choose whole grain bread over white bread. I wouldn’t be able to say “Hey! I need new sandals because these are just ugly!” Nope. I would be canning and hoarding and scraping to make sure my kids had a roof over their heads, not worrying about going to basic cable instead of America’s Top 150 on Dish. My children have closets full of clothes and have milk and meat everyday. I’m scrimping and saving to keep these things. So they don’t go without them. Not so they’ll survive. Because I have no worries that our money woes are going to cause our kids to get sick, go homeless or die. We are LUCKY. I don’t think enough people realize just how lucky they are.

I’m still coming up with a budget, though. I like our little luxuries and don’t want to have to give them up. I like having cable and the internet and being able to buy my kids little cheap toys every so often. I like being able to choose between good food and processed. I like that I can take my girls to a decent doctor and not have to worry about them dying from an ear infection (my great-uncle died from an ear infection when he was 1 year old). We have one car (and it runs!), two tvs (we married our households so one of them is 15 years old), and one PC. Our bills are paid on time every month and our refrigerator is always stocked. We’ve got it good. I’m not complaining. I’m counting my blessings.

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May
14

Growing a Mommy

Posted by Lizzie

The last couple of days have been a little challenging for me. I’m trying to help Pee Wee adjust to being a mother- while she’s still a child. She’s really depending on me through this time and I’m certainly happy to help, but I worry that she’s depending on me too much with regards to caring for KJ. I’ve been staying up late with her to help her with breastfeeding at night (encouragement and help with latching on mostly) and then getting up with Mags in the morning. If I had a private jet charter we’d all be down in the Florida Keys right now, enjoying the salty breezes and doing all this in the warm sunshine.

At any rate, Mags is a little lost, but she’s working on it. I’ve been trying to help her adjust the best that I can by letting her help me and encouraging Pee Wee to ask for her help. She’s also needed a few extra cuddles and at one point wanted me to hold her like a little baby. We’ve been trying to adjust and I want her to know that she’s still my baby and that KJ is Pee Wee’s baby. I think she’s starting to be ok with that, as long as she can have my attention whenever she wants it.

Right now it seems like one or the other of my daughters is always calling for me. “Can you get me some juice…can you get his diapers…I’m hungry…Can you change the channel…Can you…” It’s not that I’m complaining (though it does sound like it) I’m just getting really tired and I really have stuff I need to do.

Last night I explained to Pee Wee that she needs to learn that some things she can do for herself. For instance, she can carry KJ along with her (or lay him in his bassinet) while she’s getting her juice. I also reminded her of the importance of naps. She’s got this thing (which has been for her entire life) that she has to actually experience something before she believes it to be true. I told her before she had KJ that she would be really tired, that her nipples would be sore, that it would be a struggle the first couple of weeks, etc, but she didn’t seem to believe me. Now she’s saying “I’m so tired…My nipples hurt…I feel like I’m always feeding…” and so I had to remind her that she knew all of this beforehand. I’ve officially ordered her regular naps and am making sure she doesn’t spend all her free time (read: time not feeding) on MySpace or on the phone. She’s frustrated with me because her free time isn’t really free anymore, but what can I do? Newborns are a lot of work. Especially breastfed newborns. She’s out of school right now, so she has plenty of time to learn the ropes. And not-so-much time for playing with her buds. The joys of teenage motherhood, huh? I was there. I know. I hope I can help her do better than I did.

I’m hoping in a few more days things will level out and we’ll find a good routine.

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