Today is Good

Today is one of the best days I’ve had in a long time, I think.

When I first woke up I was sore and a little woozy. I thought for sure it was going to be a bad episode day. So, I went researching to see what the hell is wrong with me. I found a lot of things that just made me want to poke my own eyes out. (Have you ever done research on your condition to the point that you just knew you were dying?) Then I made a decision that I really hope I won’t live to regret.

I broke out the Cymbalta. Back in August I wrote that my doctor wanted me to take SSRIs and I refused. He’d actually given me samples to try, because he wanted me to find a working dose for me. I didn’t like that idea because of my previous experiences with those types of drugs. He was very insistent that I take it and that’s the last time I ever went back to him. I almost threw the samples in the trash. Who knows why I didn’t. Anyway, today I took one along side my pain meds.

I feel a lot better mentally. I can still feel the nagging pain in my arms and hips and everything is still really stiff, but I’m clear headed. That’s what’s really important to me right now. I have a test tonight and Math class and I’m just so sick of these damned episodes. I’m willing, at this point, to pretty much try anything. I’m getting desperate, I guess.

If this stuff helps me focus I’ll deal with the other side effects. If it keeps that dastardly fog at bay it may just become my best friend. We’ll see how it goes. I’m still going to find a Rheumatologist because I do think my condition is autoimmune. I have symptoms of both Fibromyalgia and Lupus (and I just found out Celiac Disease… huh?). I’ve even read that it’s possible to have both conditions at the same time. Talk about a maddening combination!

At any rate, the Cymbalta seems to have helped a lot so far. I really do feel so much better today that I have in a long time. That’s something to be thankful for.

Now, if I can get through that Web Tech test tonight I’ll be good to go. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Update:
I had to throw it away. I had vivid dreams and couldn’t sleep. Didn’t do much for my pain after all. And certainly didn’t do anything good for my level of focus. Oh well. On to something else.